Traveling

The silly thing about traveling alone is that it's really easy to lose yourself. For me it's a good thing. I travel and I find myself lost in the dreams of sunken empires, young minds, grand buildings, sunrises and sets and whatever else I happen upon. I let it all change me, affect me. I want to feel it all and not miss a moment. This is me traveling like the cliche feather in the wind that I am, that defines me.

Others who I cling to for stability are able to withstand their surroundings like mountains. They amaze me as I brush past them on my way to see this building and that Buddha. I see them, but to me they are reference points. I look at them, understand them, then run the other way in search of something more. Near parallel with my real life, where I do the same with people I meet in my everyday. I see them, walk by and never look back. I could feel bad, but I think it's that way for everyone isn't it?

I think this is why I like traveling. While doing so it is okay to see things for a moment and then never again because that's all it is, a moment. You have it forever and yet you don't. It's there and yet it's fleeting. A snapped picture later and you wonder whether any of it happened at all.

It is then that I think the world for my camera, and then thank my camera for lasting as long as it can on wretched power sources. Without its snap I would never remember the shot, without it's flash I would never see the dark. It's amazing how we can capture an entire journey with a few photos and notes. You'd think a two week escapade would need many pages and resources to captivate. Yet, as I look through my photos one by one, as I study their outlines and faces and lighting and texture I begin to see that such a journey will be reduced to just those things, that I will never be able to relive those moments ever again. They are gone though present. They can be remembered yet forgotten. Such a silly way to view things, in photographs and words. They're terribly nondescript for the foreign eye. To me I see the laughs and jokes behind the smiles, the anger behind the frowns. I know the reason and it makes no never mind to anyone else. To me these pictures are not fleeting, they are not momentary, they are permanent in my hippocampus. Then again, they wouldn't be permanent without the picture itself. Thus, I love the picture just as I love the memory that it retains.

I have therefore picked my most favorite photos of my journey through Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand and Malaysia. In them are my memories which I will try to describe for you.

In northern Thailand I took a 3 day trek through the jungle. The first day I and my tour group got to ride elephants! Yet as I was the only one without a 'pair', I was told to ride not on my own elephant with my own chair but on as a third person an already chair taken elephant. Thus, I got/had to ride directly on the elephant's head! So going up and down the hills for an hour was very interesting and very scary! No safety net, no handles except for the chair and couple's legs behind me. This is the top of my elephants head. His hair was surprisingly corse and scratchy through my fisherman's pants. And needless to say I don't need to experience this again. It was fun, but no, not again!
This is the first tour group I was with. The long tour of 9 days through three countries: Vietnam for two days, Cambodia for five and Thailand for two. They were a fun group and I miss them actually! It's only been a week but we felt like family. This picture is in front of Independence Monument in downtown Phnom Penh, Cambodia.
This is of S21, the famous prison and torture center for the Khmer Rouge. As an outsider it's hard to believe that such atrocities happened only a short time ago in that lovely country, but at this place it's all too real. The floors are still blood stained some thirty-odd years later. The ceilings and walls still have splatter. It's a sick display of the terror humanity can conjure, yet a necessary one. Without this place as a standing reminder to be human, I almost think human kind could easily forget. I and the others in my group were white with horror as we walked through cell after cell. I can only hope every person finds the same feelings. If not, I dare say they are not human.
I thought this man was so ironic. We were told to respect the monks because they are sacred. For women, we aren't supposed to even touch them, and men are supposed to avoid touching them. No pictures and no talking to them. Well, a monks duties usually include turning away from all material things. I thought cell phones would be on that list, but negative. This man was quite into his conversation. I like to think he's giving or receiving guidance... that or ordering a pizza.
These are the hill tribe huts that I and my second tour group stayed in. They were up quite a ways on the mountain, but worth the hike. Simple yet beautiful in their simplicity, I was happiest while laying on the bench in the sunlight listening to the wild birds coo and caw. Another favorite spot, this was the hammock on the second floor back deck of the guest house I stayed at in Chang Mai, Thailand. I loved it. I spent only one afternoon here, but would gladly have given all my souvenirs and possessions away to spend the rest of my life here.
I snapped this without cause, but now that I look at it I quite love it. I love his face, his eyes, his patriotic pose towards the setting sun. He looks beautiful to me, and reminds me of every face I saw in Cambodia, every single beautiful face.
This boat trip was spontaneous as was this picture. I like it because it shows the stillness yet motion of life on "The Lake". The Lake- it has a name I can't remember nor pronounce- is this river/lakes that turn into one gargantuan lake in monsoon season. There's great fishing there, so hundreds and thousands of families build their houses there. In the dry season the houses are on stilts, and in the wet they float. They live a stable yet rough existence. I think it's amazing and commend them for their resolve. The kids know nothing else of course, yet still they must be tough even if born so. I like the dreams they still have, the wishes in their eyes when they look to the sun. They are the same of me and any other person. It was here that I recognized humanity.
Angkor Wat at sunrise. A beautiful morning spent watching the rising sun at one of the oldest, most well preserved temples in the world. An awe inspiring event that I have no words, nor even pictures to justify its greatness.

The Cambodian Royal Palace in Phnom Penh. It was marvelous, just like every palace I ever imagined. It's beautifully manicured lawns and old menageries of brilliant green complemented the golden exterior of the palace buildings. The designs and jeweled inlays screamed royalty more than any European building I've ever seen. To me, this was the kingdom I've dreamed. Louis XIV had no idea.